Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Geek Cred

It occurred to me this morning, while drinking my coffee, that I have recently made a whole passel of new electronic friends. Some of them I talk to directly, some have orbits that have intersected mine.

For the recent arrivals, I'm going to reveal the sordid tale of my origin...

Sherman, set the wayback machine for 1979. Whereupon you will see a wee lad of 11 years old playing some indescribable game involving running and several other activities which have become hazy over the long years. This young man arrives at a friends house, to find his friends older brother sitting on the front porch, open book on lap, tossing strange colored plastic bits about. This was my first exposure to D&D. In it's red book form. This caught my attention, I don't know why, can anyone really pin down what about D&D attracted their attention in the beginning.

Understand dear reader, I was already well on my way to geekdom. I woke up every morning at 5am to watch "Battle of the Planets" with G-Force, and the Phoenix ship. (yes I am "that" old). My parents must have thought me insane, no pre-teen boy, wakes up that early voluntarily. My dad used to have to pry me out of bed to go fishing at 7am. To continue, I had spent the summer of 1977 in the Cooper Cameo 70mm movie theater watching Star Wars, like every other boy on my block, and I had a wicked collection of action figures.

I do not clearly remember how long it was after that that I went to a friends house, Chris is the only thing I remember about him, that and he wore glasses and braces, but I do remember seeing that strange book in his room, and I asked him what it was. He went on to explain to me that this was Dungeons & Dragons, a role playing game. I believe it was at this point I said the most intelligent thing I could think of at the time, "Huh?". What did you expect, I was 11 or 12. Here is where it really begins, I made my first D&D character. I don't remember what I named him, but I do recall he was an Elf. I had Plate mail and a Battle Axe (because, Battle Axe just sounded cool). The details of my first adventure are hazy, like everything in my life at that age, however I remember most vividly ending up in a graveyard at night. While taking my nighttime stroll through said necropolis, I came to be entangled by something grasping my foot. Imagine a Basic D&D Elf, in plate mail, flailing about with a battle axe. Comedic gold nowadays, back then, I was fighting for my life. It was during this tussle, I managed to cut off my toe. I rolled a 1 *sadface*. It was then the hideous undead thing crawled out of ground and it was reveled to me to be a Wight. Sorry, I don't remember how that encounter ended but I was hopelessly hooked. I wanted to do this all the time, I wanted to live in that world, I wanted to explore, and fight monsters, and explore some more. Then I discovered Advanced Dungeons & Dragons. This is where my story differs from most others. My mother, for christmas, bought me The Dungeon Masters Guide. Most folks, when asked, will say they got the Players Handbook first. I take that as a sign of my impending doom. I was destined to become the unrepentant control freak I am today. I was destined to become a Dungeon Master, creator of worlds.

Six months after that, for my birthday, I got the Players Handbook, and the Monster Manual. I still have those same books, if it matters. Within a mile of the middle school where I was tortured for 3 years, was a store called "Hobbies". Run by a gruff gentlemen we only knew as "Al", this is where I checked in two to three times a week after school, to keep up on the latest publishings from TSR. Over the years, I became involved in Star Frontiers and Traveller, but I always come back to where it all started, D&D.

I collected the original Dragon Lance modules, brand new, as they were released. All kender must DIE!
Throughout middle school, and high school, I and my friends ran everything we could afford to buy. I had 3 main characters that survived those days. Lethric Gillenhammer, Half Elf, Ranger/Magic User. Steelgarn Swordmaster, Barbarian carrying flintlock pistols, and Eubeen Hadd, Halfling Thief, who wore Gauntlets of Ogre Power and a Girdle of Storm Giant Strength.

There you go folks, that's how it all started. My origins, as snore-fest inducing as an episode of "Grass Growing weekly", or "Let's watch Cars Rust". But now you know.